Why People Don’t Change Until They Have To

I became a therapist thinking that people just naturally wanted to change, grow, get better, become healthier… and how cool was that going to be to assist in that process?!

Boy, was I naive. After 20 years as a therapist, what I discovered is that it is extremely rare for anyone to make real change unless they absolutely have to.

That’s just Humans 101.

When Does Change Happen?

Your back is up against a wall. Avoidance and denial aren’t working anymore and reality is biting you in the proverbial rear end. Your symptoms are killing you. Or you’ve hit rock bottom. Hard. You’ve finally gotten a wake-up call so loud it’s already burst the eardrums of everyone within a 50-mile radius. Then it dawns on you. Hey, maybe I should do something about this

When Should Change Happen?

Is that the best time to try to work on changing something? When there are no other options left? Actually, (I hate to say it!) it really can be.

What’s My Motivation?

There’s no motivation like this: Learn how to communicate or your wife is going to leave you. (Or she’s already gone and you’re trying to get her back.) Figure out how to resolve conflict better with your boss or you’re going to get fired. Get sober or lose any chance of having a normal life. Oh, and good luck getting your driver’s license back.

Changing Before You Have To

Sometimes knowing that it would be good for you to change just isn’t enough. I still really wish it were. But sometimes you have to know there aren’t any other options left. If you’re smart enough to see that your behavior is getting you to that place where you will eventually hit rock bottom and you decide to do something about it, that’s great. No, it’s more than great. It’s amazing! Because it’s really, really rare.

Deciding to change before you have to gets you a gold star before you even begin.

DrAnita Sanz, PhD, Psychologist

Please Don’t Try to Change

Don’t Try! I mean it. Don’t try to change. Not one thing. Not your bad habits, your bad behavior, or your bad attitude. Surprising advice from…

Read More

The Art of Being Present

Marina Abramovic This week I am compelled to tell you about an amazing documentary I recently watched on HBO of the performance artist, Marina Abramovic,…

Read More

The Vow You Really Need

THE SECRET TO A LONG HAPPY RELATIONSHIP I’m going to share with you one of the greatest secrets to a long-lasting, healthy relationship…other than using…

Read More

How To Kick A Food Addiction

How do you get over an addiction to food? You’re Not Addicted to Food To be clear, you can’t have an addiction to food. Or…

Read More

What’s Your “Baby?”

Babies…cute, cuddly, sweet, adorable.  Right? Well, yes… and no. Now I know some people love taking care of babies and I have incredible respect for…

Read More

My Favorite Life Planner Hacks

I have been using a Life Planner for decades, switching between different types to see which one worked best for me. You may have done…

Read More
error: Content is protected !!
Scroll to Top