{"id":1324,"date":"2023-04-10T23:15:12","date_gmt":"2023-04-10T23:15:12","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/anitasanz.com\/?p=1324"},"modified":"2024-09-02T23:59:33","modified_gmt":"2024-09-02T23:59:33","slug":"i-didnt-put-relax-on-my-to-do-list","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/anitasanz.com\/wp-dev\/i-didnt-put-relax-on-my-to-do-list\/","title":{"rendered":"I Didn\u2019t Put RELAX on my To Do List!"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Maybe this isn\u2019t your problem. Maybe your problem is you\u2019re relaxing TOO much and the dishes have been sitting in the sink in the kitchen for over two weeks now. Growing an interesting mixture of molds that might just cure cancer if we knew what to do with them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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But maybe this IS your problem\u2026the dishes may still be sitting in the sink, but it\u2019s because you\u2019re running around like a chicken with its head cut off and you\u2019re going to get to those dishes just as soon as you get back from your kid\u2019s gymnastics\/dance\/karate\/little league game and can get a casserole in the oven (yeah right\u2026), throw a load of laundry in, help with homework, get online to make sure you don\u2019t bounce more checks, finish up that project from work\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If this is sounding familiar, the dishes in the sink are the least of your worries. You think \u201cIf only I could get a little quiet, downtime to myself\u2026that would feel so good.\u201d Then, if by some miracle, you actually end up with an hour or more to yourself to do anything you want\u2026you just end up doing more chores or errands instead of relaxing and doing nothing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You don\u2019t take your DOWN time, you turn it into more UP time. What\u2019s UP with that?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

IF I\u2019M NOT DOING SOMETHING, I FEEL GUILTY<\/strong><\/h5>\n\n\n\n

I hear too many people say they can\u2019t relax, they can\u2019t possibly take an hour to sit and do nothing (I think that\u2019s called meditation?) because that\u2019s being lazy. There\u2019s too much to do. That\u2019s a waste of time. They\u2019ll just feel guilty with all those dishes and piles of whatever staring them down if they try to get away with an hour or two of recharging their batteries.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If there are things still written on the TO DO list, then it\u2019s not okay to just hang around listening to your favorite music and reading a trashy magazine so you can discover why you should start\/stop wearing leopard prints this season.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Well, guess what? (You perfectionists are not going to like this!) There is ALWAYS going to be something left on your TO-DO list! There is ALWAYS going to be something that needs to be washed, cleaned, ironed, checked, balanced, organized, or completed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You will never, never, ever reach the end of your TO DO list\u2026if you are alive, that is. Once you\u2019re dead, I think you\u2019re off the hook. No one\u2019s really going to expect you to come back from the grave and finish those dishes. Geez, I hope not anyway.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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A PERSON\u2019S LIFE MAINTENANCE IS NEVER DONE<\/strong><\/h5>\n\n\n\n

The deal is that this life maintenance thing is supposed to be an ongoing process\u2026a work in progress\u2026that is never complete. It\u2019s like a game of double Dutch jump rope where you just jump in and play for however long you want to or can and then jump back out and rest awhile. It\u2019ll be there ready for you when you\u2019re ready to jump back in. That pile of laundry isn\u2019t going anywhere. Trust me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Those dishes are not moving. Those credit card applications are not going to throw themselves into the shredder by themselves\u2026don\u2019t you wish they could? The windows, floors, bathrooms, junk drawers, garage, and closets aren\u2019t going to organize themselves while you take a moment with Calgon.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So, you really do have permission to take a break, step out of the game for a while to take a breather, get a glass of ice-cold lemonade or perfect hot chocolate, and RELAX!!!! You can catch your breath, gather some energy again, and jump back in when you\u2019re good and ready.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You\u2019re not being lazy when you take that time for yourself, you\u2019re taking care of yourself and recharging your batteries so you can keep going, you Energizer bunny, you! The whole purpose of taking downtime is that it should have no purpose\u2026no productive value. It\u2019s all about just relaxing, enjoying, being\u2026 a human being instead of a human doing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When you want to do a long jump, you don\u2019t just jump from the scratch line. You back waaaaayyyyy up\u2026. to gather some momentum. But at first, it looks like you are going in the wrong direction. Getting your downtime is just your way of backing up, gathering energy and momentum, to be able to move forward again with a sense of joy and purpose.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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So, it\u2019s really okay to put RELAX on the top of your TO DO List. Don\u2019t worry about all the rest of the stuff on your TO DO list. It\u2019s not going anywhere. It\u2019ll be there, safe and sound, right where you left it when you\u2019re relaxed, recharged, and ready to tackle it all again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So go do nothing for awhile and see if you can do it without feeling guilty. For a change.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Dr<\/em>.\u00a0Anita Sanz<\/em>, PhD, Psychologist<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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